Another Substack? Another person asking you to subscribe to their work (to what end?) and clutter your inbox? More content from a person who’s regularly touting their own need to simplify, minimize, and silence anything “extra”?
Listen, I get it. This project is perhaps more for me than anyone else. I’m a writer without an upcoming project, and a writer needs to write.
Actually, let me rephrase. I’m a person who writes. In this season of my life (staying home to raise three children: 6, nearly 4, and 3 months), it’s hard to consider myself as anything but a caregiver. Maybe on a good day I’d call myself a nurturer, an in-home chef, a home-educator, a *homemaker* (a stretch). But presently, it’s hard to call myself a writer. Gone are the days of uninterrupted hours of productive creativity. Gone are the days when my purpose appeared clear and linear.
I’m learning (again) that I must dislocate who I am from what I do. It’s a lesson I’ve “learned” so many times I’m embarrassed to write it. This idea is the fundamental tenant of the central truth of my life. You’d think it would have sunk deep enough for me not to need another reminder.
God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
Ephesians 2:8-10 NLT
But here I am. Sad that I don’t have infinite time to write and create. Feeling guilty that motherhood doesn’t fulfill my creative yearnings. Wishing for a segmented life, where work and life and pouring myself out and being filled up happened in clearly defined, predictable boxes. But that is not my life. And I’m guessing it’s not yours either.
Lucky for all of us, my identity crisis is not the theme of this new project. But it is the reason I’m starting it. In the past, I've launched big ideas when feeling lost in the immensity of motherhood: I started a website after my first son was born, wrote a book after the second.
Our third baby, a little girl, was born in December. And here I am, beginning the 2023 version of a mom-blog to feel like myself again. Chances are, I’ll write occasionally (I named the blog Goodness Weekly in a rush of optimism). Here’s what I predict I’ll write about:
The way mothering my children reminds me of the way God parents (loves, guides, teaches, disciplines) us.
Ridiculous things my children do and say, and how poorly I react.
Little delights (this is a big category, we’ll see how it shapes up).
Art, poetry, and other beautiful things bringing life into my home and heart.
Home education - wins, losses, resources, woe-is-me’s.
This project, I can assure you, will be poorly edited; untidy and scattered. But so is my brain, so we’ll call it “authentic”, give one another a knowing smile, and move on.
I hope you’ll find something here that blesses you. Maybe it will make you feel less crazy, maybe something that’s worked for me will work for you, maybe my own frantic grasp at creativity will encourage you to try something yourself. Or maybe you’ll read this entry and promptly unsubscribe.
Whatever you choose to do—stick around or go on your blessed way—I’ll do my best to show up and share. For your sake and for mine.
Why not, right!
Just wanted to say I LOVE this Katie. Thank you for using your tender, powerful, honest voice to make us all feel less alone and more alive. Keep going sister. Your art matters. So so much. - Christina